The Fourth of July and the Question of What is America (with some help from Lou Gehrig, Jimmy Choi, and Tom Friedman)

On July 8, 1996, I came home from my time in England, and while it wasn’t by choice, rather by the necessity of avoiding poverty and a life of working crap jobs and the effect it took on my relationship with the British woman that I was with at the time, I knew that in some ways I had to make peace with my idea of what America was if I was ever going to survive and thrive in this change I was about to face.

Prior to going to England with the Air Force, I made the mistake of assuming, as many people are prone to do, that America was the leaders and the institutions that seemed remote, misguided, and elite to me. To make a long story short (and save it for Saturday, which is the 21^st anniversary of my time back in America after being away from December 27, 1990, to that July day in 1996 (save a few vacations)), I ended up finding meaning on the highways of America, which led to the Nature, history, and the specific culture of this country. For me, that culture was literature, baseball, music, and the expression of the people. In the end, America is whatever you want it to be since there are so many distinct things that make lots of cultures American.

With that being said, nothing sums up America to me more than John Dos Passos’s quote from his 1919 book (a part of the U.S.A. Trilogy):

“U. S. A. is the slice of a continent. U. S. A. is a group of holding companies, some aggregations of trade unions, a set of laws bound in calf, a radio network, a chain of moving picture theatres, a column of stock quotations rubbed out and written in by a Western Union boy on a blackboard, a public-library full of old newspapers and dog-eared history books with protests scrawled on the margins in pencil. U. S. A. is the world's greatest river valley fringed with mountains and hills, U. S. A. is a set of big-mouthed officials with too many bank accounts. U. S. A. is a lot of men buried in their uniforms in Arlington Cemetery. U. S. A. is the letters at the end of an address when you are away from home. But mostly U. S. A. is the speech of the people.”

As a tribute to Mr. Dos Passos, here are some images I've seen that reflect America to me. There are many more, but this is a good representation. 

Reflecting on the ideas enclosed within, a task that allows for much more thought than the limited words of a simple paragraph, we get a lot of the things that bring us to the Fourth of July. Be it George and Thomas and Patrick and all of those other Founding Fathers who did what they had to do (while keeping Ben protected enough from himself and his indiscretions not to spill the beans on American revolutionary intentions) to make the day possible in the first place. And speaking of those men, we have Misters Jefferson and Adams dying on the same day (July 4, 1826). There was also the announcement of the Louisiana Purchase in 1803 a year after West Point was established. In 1845, Thoreau went to Walden to live deliberately, observe nature, protest the US government’s wartime actions, and write a book of the same name, declaring his independence in an act that mattered a whole lot more to the world after he died. Ten years later, Walt Whitman published Leaves of Grass in 1855. In 1863, the battle at Gettysburg ended with the South crushed after Pickett ordered his misguided charge. Several decades later, the Tuskegee Institute was founded in 1881 and Buffalo Bill had his first Wild West Show in 1883. A year later, the U.S. was given the Statue of Liberty. In 1931, the first fireworks display is held in Cleveland (then in 1969, an Ohio fireworks accident killed 18 and destroyed a lot boats on Lake Erie – fireworks safety, guys!). In 1942, America begins a bombing campaign in Europe. Two years later, 1,100 American guns fire a “salute” at German lines and American Marines raise a flag on Iwo Jima. In 1970, Casey Kasem debuts American Top 40. In 1989, Drew Barrymore, at age 14, attempts suicide unsuccessfully (thankfully), and she goes on to make the classic movie The Wedding Singer with Adam Sandler, which really is that good. In 1996, Hotmail becomes a thing. In 2004, the corner of the Freedom Tower was laid. In 2012, the scientists at CERN announced the finding of the Higgs-Boson (God) Particle. And last year, NASA put the spacecraft Juno into Jupiter’s orbit.

Oh yeah, and in 1939, the great Lou Gehrig gave a speech.

On the day after Jimmy Choi, Parkinson’s athlete, completed the first 2 obstacles on the American Ninja Warrior course despite the condition that holds him (and me) in its grasp, thinking about the words of a man who nearly hit .300 the first year of his having ALS is something defining and particularly American. While Gehrig had to retire his second year of having ALS, his speech is an encouragement to all people, not just people with disabilities. The same is true for Mr. Choi, who stood tall as a strong athlete as a role model for all people, not just all Parkisnon's people. If you get a chance, watch the video for the first time or again. You'll be glad you did.

We are a nation of doers. We speak in active voice. Things don’t happen to us. We do them. The world looks to us for innovation and leadership. While we aren’t unique in this, we are exceptional in this. That’s why people the country and world over look at us like “what the heck are you doing?” when our politics and attitudes get so out of line with what’s good for today, tomorrow, and the next day. Simply put, the answer is, "We aren't that guy or the other woman, who we were given as a choice. Hell, the ones that are elected do little to represent us a whole," but that's not us. We are a good lot of people that care about a lot of things. We want a better life for us and those around us (to include our children's children). We don't want to sacrifice what belongs to the collective us for the benefit of others. Isn't that taxation without representation? We fought a war to get rid of kings, queens, and out of touch authority, so for those asking us that question now, nothing has changed except the faces who aren't governing for the people.

On that note, I think of the recent words of one of my favorite authors, Tom Friedman, who writes about international relations and technology for the New York Times (in books like The World is Flat, That Used to Be Us, and Thank You for Being Late). A couple of weeks ago, he said:

"I fear we're seeing the end of 'truth' - that we just can't agree any more on basic facts. And I fear we're becoming Sunnis and Shiites - We call them 'Democrats' and 'Republicans,' but the sectarianism that has destroyed nation states of the Middle East is now infecting us."

After talking about how the extremes of both sides of the coin have gotten out of hand, he ended the article with these thoughts:

"In the long run, the only thing that will save us is if more people - no matter what age, color, gender, or faith - build moral authority in their respective realms and then use it to do big, meaningful things. Use it to run for office, start a company, operate a school, lead a movement, or build a community organization. And in doing so, you can help put the 'we' back in 'we the people.'"

To that end, I felt inclined to give you 2 other versions of the Star Spangled Banner (Hendrix and Jose Feliciano) as well as an old playlist I had of songs that said America to me (from 2011). Both versions of this song caused a stir because they weren't the voice of the people (or something like that with regard to whatever the original intent of the song was theoretically supposed to be). However, I think they're still important, perhaps more so than ever despite being almost 50 years old, so enjoy them.

1. America by Simon and Garfunkel

2. Guaranteed by Eddie Vedder

3. When You Wake up Feeling Old (live) by Jeff Tweedy

4. Helplessness Blues by Fleet Foxes

5. Windfall by Son Volt

6. May This Be Love (Waterfall) by Hendrix

7. Stars Fell on Alabama by Jimmy Buffett

8. My Back Pages by The Byrds

9. Mrs. Potter's Lullaby by Counting Crows

10. Freefallin by Tom Petty

11. I Got You by Train

12. Superbad by James Brown

13. The Joker by Steve Miller Band

14. More Than a Feeling by Boston

15. Get off This by Cracker

16. Pink Houses by John Cougar Mellencamp

17. Piano Man by Billy Joel

18. I Can Hear Music by the Beach Boys

19. When You're Smiling by Frank Sinatra

20. Take Me out to the Ball Game by Frank Sinatra and Gene Kelly.

And since I feel a post thought coming, I'll leave you with this version of "This Land is Your Land" by Bruce Springsteen. Happy 4th of July. May your picnics, fireworks, and days be filled with happiness and joy, today and every day!

A Return to the Magical Land of Amantadine! (REVISED - April 2018)

           Like many medicines, Amantadine (which sounds like the name of a magical kingdom like Narnia or almost anything out of Star Wars, Avatar, or the Lord of the Rings) was originally created to treat influenza, but it was found to be a very helpful product for Parkinson’s. While that makes it very lucrative and pricey in non-generic form, like all medicines, it’s definitely not the cash cow that the blood pressure medicine sildenafil was when it was revealed that it also treats erectile dysfunction. As a result it became Viagra. For those not in the know (and I googled this just now to find an accurate price), Viagra is about $60 a pill! As with any other med, when a person needs it, he or she pays the price or goes without it in this capitalistic world. Fortunately for those needing it, news also shows it will be available in December as a generic medicine (2 years early), though with only one company making the generic, it won't be that much cheaper (once again, capitalism and the Law of Supply and Demand). That said, for those getting generic sildenafil, that came out at $20+for a 30 pill prescription that wouldn’t be honored if the doctor prescribed Viagra.

            So yes, in life and in research, we learn (and I teach) that all actions have a reaction. Sometimes, it’s a good reaction. We clean up pollution, and wildlife is able to flourish in that area again. I donate $25 to a cause, and that cause can do something with it for the positive (hopefully and ideally). However, there are side effects to any reaction. For instance, I take the trash to a landfill, and that trash collection site becomes a less viable world (a necessary evil - unlike Trump stripping UNESCO biospehere reserve tags from beautiful places and trying to eliminate National Monument protection from other sites, but I digress). I give $25 to 1 cause, say the Ice Bucket Challenge, and that money might have went to something else. Maybe I won’t be able to do dinner at McDonald’s and an overpriced summer blockbuster, or it will take away charitable funds for other conditions that I would have donated to in years past. I’ll live without the food, but what will happen to other charities if they don’t create fads that wrack in big bucks (and the Ice Bucket Challenge raised $115 million the first year, but just a little over $1 million when it wasn’t “cool” to post videos anymore). No knock on what they did, which was initially brilliant since it worked to find a cure to a devastating disease that has harmed and destroyed countless lives (victims, families, friends) since well before Lou Gehrig gavethe disease of ALS an easier to remember name.

            Bill James, who is a Sabrmetrics guru (see Moneyball, the movie with Brad Pitt based on the book by Michael Lewis - though it only mentions James once at the end), wrote in his giant baseball book of baseball statistics (Historical Baseball Abstract) that when we look at statistics and facts (as applied to baseball), we need to see:

•      1) what is missing from the picture?

•      2) what is distorted here, and what is accurately portrayed?

•      3) How can we include what has been left out?

•      4) How can we correct what has been distorted?

There is also a follow-up part, where I ask:

What good things come from these reactions?
Why are the reactions caused?
What side effects do the reactions create?
How can the bad reactions be prevented?
Are there further ramifications of the reactions?

I think about this now as I experience my own effects with Amantadine. For instance, on a good note, my hand doesn’t tremor as much (nor does my left foot, though the right one is almost always tapping in restlessness). It’s not perfect, but it’s better.

However, there are a series of side effects that it does cause. One of these is nausea. While it’s not sickness for me, it means I don’t feel like eating as much or as often. Right now, this is A-OK with me because I consumed enough calories since returning from my time England on July 8, 1996, to cover me until next year, so half rations means I might actually have a chance to get into some of those old pants I’ve been saving because I’m not giving up hope that I’ll be able to get into them again.

The big side effect that hits me is the lack of sleep I’ve been getting as compared to what I had been getting. For example, I would sleep 10+ hours and still feel tired (writer's note April 19, 2018 - that could also have been from my sleep apnea). Now, it’s a fight to get to 7-8 hours. I feel wide awake when I get up to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night, and I’m not able to fall asleep on a dime when I return to bed, which leads me to wonder if I’ll be awake all night. That said, when I finally am tired enough to go to bed, I have no problem sleeping. Not that I know what traditional insomnia is, but I am usually up until 11PM / midnight, and then I wake up about 5-6AM and try to stay asleep until 7-8AM. I’m taking this as a good thing for now because I don’t feel tired enough to nap in the afternoons. I also should say that I'm lucky since I don't feel any of the other side effects with it (you can see the whole list here, but they include light-headed-ness, ankle swelling, hallucinations, and a rare purple color on the legs).

On the note of being lightheaded, I will speculate that Parkinson's is also why I can't be on a decline (with my head lower than my body), though I have none of the weird feelings just going from sitting to standing or standing to laying down that some people have. That said, I'm not sure if it explains why I sometimes can't ride as a passenger in a car without feeling motion sick (though I have no problem as a driver - I guess I'm just weird). 

As for Parkinson’s itself, I can’t say much of what’s changed about me other than rusty knees, dystonia, and bradykinesia effects I've blogged on, though I’m always asked by the doctor about memory, and I always say the same thing: I feel sharp and on with my thoughts. I still type quickly, and I am responsive with replies and connections. Knowing that about me makes me happy, though it does cause me to feel concerned and sympathetic to those who aren't at that point anymore in the stages of their disease. 

I will also say I do feel more energized with the Amantadine (no desire for afternoon siestas). I have been doing rails to trails walks lately (and will today). Though they aren't long walks in wooded places, they're still exercise. Fairly soon, I'll do one today to get the knees loosened up again. The key is to not let the voices in my head make me stagnate (easier said than done sometimes).

I'm also always asked by my doctor about vivid dreams, which I have to say has always been the norm in my life. I've written before about how I love the idea of dreaming, be it during the day for novels or travel or at night to see what kind of a show I get. I'm fascinated by dreams, and since they're not scary, even though my books are about the supernatural, I'm OK with that.

That said, when it comes to Parkinson's effects, I definitely feel the afternoon heat more than I did before. Nevertheless, some of that’s easy to combat by hauling water with or staying in the shade. Besides, if I need to, I can always grade stuff or work on my writing in the afternoons (something I’ve been doing lately, which is why I haven’t been blogging – almost done with the first draft of The Rules of the Game!).

So to all of you fighting the good fight, here’s hoping you feel good and that you have worked around your effects and side effects to enjoy your lives! Happy summer 2017!

The Return of Spring and the Best Baseball Season Ever

            Around these parts, winter is still here, but it’s not as bad. This morning was in the 20s, and the wind wasn’t howling and shaking the trees like it has in other days these past few weeks. Frankly, a sweater was enough to walk to the car and then “brrr” as I put the heater and the mp3 player on until things warmed up for me to feel comfortable on my 30 minute drive to work.

            With only 1 month left of winter and a Florida vacation to see friends in Jacksonville looming in 20 days, the thoughts of flowers and new life are everywhere. The snowdrops (a type of flower, which is pictured above) are pushing through, and if Facebook is to be trusted, so are the crocuses, but I haven’t seen them in our yard. Frankly, I just haven’t had time. There’s just too much have to do work going on.

Because of what I don’t have time to see because of that nagging, pestering work and grading, there are other things I haven’t seen. Word around the campfire also says that the great-horned owls who have nested with their babies at Ephrata Park are back to fornicating again because there’s pictures of one of these birds standing guard at the tree’s natural opening. This must be investigated, so when I’m driving home from work today at noon, I will be there with my trusty camera hoping to see them or him or her standing guard in that tree opening today.

            A man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do.

            But in my annual tradition of the end of the hot stove watch, there is the all-important return of the baseball season, though if truth be told, I don’t turn MLBTV off all winter. Now, with February’s end in sight and the groundhog not to be believed, there is that great truth to this period of time and that is that real, new baseball is back. Florida and Arizona are hopping because pitchers and catchers have reported, so life is good.

            And if baseball is back, that means that the first quasi-meaningful games of spring are back soon. This year, that also means that the United States is trying to compete in the World Baseball Classic, but let’s be honest; we don’t have the desire to rally around the flag or field a team like the Dominicans. Ownership and agents aren’t fielding Mike Trout and Bryce Harper, so is this really our best foot forward? Nevertheless, we do have some good players if you follow the game. These include Paul Goldschmidt, Nolan Arenado, Buster Posey, Eric Homser, Daniel Murphy, Andrew McCutchen, and Giancarlo Stanton. The bullpen looks good with Andrew Miller leading a lot of decent 1-inning guys, but the starters look relatively above average at best when looked at. One year and a contract run doesn’t make a career great player headed for the Hall of Fame in Cooperstown.

            So what does make a great baseball player? Apparently, it’s being a silent leader and showing up to work every day to just be great. It’s building a body that is so strong that he was once turned down for the role of Tarzan because he was too jacked. It’s putting up with the media's obsession with the star-struck, drunken, womanizing hero / lout of the world, who batted in front of him while he, Lou Gehrig, quietly hit 464 home runs by 1936, which was before his age 34 season. His age 32 season would be one of his most memorable seasons ever since it was his Triple Crown year. Nevertheless, he did have “better” statistical years. This says something since his slash-line in 1934 was a .363 batting average, 49 home runs, and 166 runs batted in, which stood as the defining offensive moment of a baseball season. That year, his on-base plus slugging (OPS) was 1.172, which was the 33^rd best season ever for this number, statistically speaking. Of course, that’s behind 4 seasons where Barry Bonds wasn’t being pitched to because he found the Fountain of the Clear and the Cream, but that too is neither here nor there.

However, by real standards, that wasn’t his best season by far. Neither was his Murderer’s Row season in 1927 when he had an OPS of 1.239, which is the 24^th best OPS ever (that year, he also had an 11.8 Wins Above Replacement, which was tied for the 7^th best season ever). The closest a current “all-time great” stands to that (Mike Trout, who really is that awesome) is 10.8, which says he’s good for 11 more wins over an average fill in guy over a 162 game season. What this means is that for an 89 win team in 2012, if the Angels don’t have Trout, they have a losing record.

Getting back to baseball stats (Sabrmetrics) in his Historical Abstract on baseball, author and baseball genius Bill James asks:

"A good statistical analyst in studying the statistical record of a baseball season, asks three or four essential questions:

1) What is missing from the picture?

2) What is distorted here, and what is accurately portrayed?

3) How can we include what has been left out?

4) How can we correct what has been distorted?"

For me, that leads us to Lou Gehrig’s 1938 season where he hit .295 with 29 home runs and 114 runs batted in. Looking at Gehrig, he hadn’t produced numbers that low since 1925 when he first started to become the Iron Horse, which came with Wally Pipp sitting out a game because of a headache. This led to Gehrig never being replaced in the lineup until 1939 when he gave up baseball due to amyotrophic lateral sclerosis, otherwise known as ALS and also known by the name Lou Gehrig’s disease.

            According to the NIH, ALS is “a rare group of neurological diseases that mainly involve the nerve cells (neurons) responsible for controlling voluntary muscle movement. Voluntary muscles produce movements like chewing, walking, breathing and talking. The disease is progressive, meaning the symptoms get worse over time. Currently, there is no cure for ALS and no effective treatment to halt, or reverse, the progression of the disease. ALS belongs to a wider group of disorders known as motor neuron diseases, which are caused by gradual deterioration (degeneration) and death of motor neurons. Motor neurons are nerve cells that extend from the brain to the spinal cord and to muscles throughout the body. These motor neurons initiate and provide vital communication links between the brain and the voluntary muscles. Messages from motor neurons in the brain (called upper motor neurons) are transmitted to motor neurons in the spinal cord and to motor nuclei of brain (called lower motor neurons) and from the spinal cord and motor nuclei of brain to a particular muscle or muscles. In ALS, both the upper motor neurons and the lower motor neurons degenerate or die, and stop sending messages to the muscles. Unable to function, the muscles gradually weaken, start to twitch (called fasciculations), and waste away (atrophy). Eventually, the brain loses its ability to initiate and control voluntary movements. Early symptoms of ALS usually include muscle weakness or stiffness. Gradually all muscles under voluntary control are affected, and individuals lose their strength and the ability to speak, eat, move, and even breathe. Most people with ALS die from respiratory failure, usually within 3 to 5 years from when the symptoms first appear. However, about 10 percent of people with ALS survive for 10 or more years.”

       If we look further on their page, we see that symptoms include:

·         fasciculations (muscle twitches) in the arm, leg, shoulder, or tongue

·         muscle cramps

·         tight and stiff muscles (spasticity)

·         muscle weakness affecting an arm, a leg, neck or diaphragm.

·         slurred and nasal speech

·         difficulty chewing or swallowing.

        Statistics show the 14-15,000 people have the disease. One of them is former NFL hero Steve Gleason, who just released a documentary about his story.

        For me, this forces a statistical adjustment, which I do on the grounds that Lou Gehrig achieved baseball excellence with ALS running through his body.

Thatyear, Gehrig didn’t get his first hit until game 6, but he was dead to rights when he slid into third base and called out. He didn’t get his second hit until game 9. His first multi-hit game was game 10, which left him with a .097 batting average before he went hitless in game 11. His first home run was in game 16, which brought him up to a .154 batting average. He would hit 28 more that year, hitting his final 1 in game 152. Prior to that and even with 2 hits in game 12, he was the worst batter in the American League with a .133 average.

Then something began to happen. Maybe it was the insults and fan’s mocking of both him and the team, but Gehrig turned it around. Pride in a person’s heart can do this as can strength in a person's convictions. As Gehrig began to compensate and work through his challenges, his May batting average was .368. In comparison, the best batting average for 2016 was DJ LeMahieu hitting .348 for the year. We haven’t had a year that good or better in baseball since 2004, when Ichiro hit .372 while setting the all-time single season hit record.

According to biographer, Jonathan Eig, this wasn’t all good. Eig stated, “Gehrig felt no pain, nothing to cause him concern, but there is evidence to suggest that he noticed the subtle change in his body… When the nerves fail to properly stimulate the body’s muscles, the muscles atrophy. As the muscles in Gehrig’s legs, shoulders, and arms began to atrophy, home runs became fly outs. Triples became doubles. Doubles became singles. He began to think about hitting for average instead of power.”

Nevertheless, even that didn’t always work.

“When he gets these attacks, they take his breath away and he has sharp pains through the small of his back. He can’t straighten up, but he nettles when someone says he has lumbago or something else that is chronic,” one writer stated after watching Gehrig get injured on the base paths after hitting a double that season.

As Lou faced the future of his consecutive game record and the ultimate disrespect some would feel for his lack of playing time, even his wife asked him to consider sitting out a game when it would be him controlling the equation instead of someone else or his health. However, Lou Gehrig would play it out for 2,130 games, only choosing to sit after being complimented for making a routine play. After all, a great man doesn't receive average compliments.

After that retirement would come the diagnosis, that July 4th quote, and his positive letters back and forth to his wife and his neurologist, which made him believe he could beat ALS, even when the game was already decided.

Through the last days, Gehrig remained tough, and his play showed how determined he was to win and to bring the Yankees back to some kind of glory, willing his body and especially his legs to carry on while battling with the press.

“I can’t see why anyone should attack my record. I have never belittled anyone else’s. I intend to play every day and shall continue to give my best to my employers and the fans. What about the guy who pays $1.10 to see the game? What if I sit on the bench and say I’m resting?”

However, life began to pile up on Gehrig. His manager, Joe McCarthy noticed his changes. In addition, he didn’t start the All-Star Game. After, this he fractured his thumb, and the x-rays noted other fractures, which had never been diagnosed as well.

“There’s always something sad about watching a ballplayer age. It’s like seeing a preview of death, played out pitch by pitch, game by game, in front of thousands of spectators. He loses a bit of speed. His eyesight fades just enough that he can’t see the spin on the ball and can’t judge the necessary split second whether it’s a fastball or a curve headed his way. The snap action in his wrist slows just enough that he can’t catch up to the fastest of the fastballs. Little by little, it all gets worse, and a player’s mind invariably turns toward retirement. But Gehrig wasn’t suffering from the normal aging process of the athlete. His skills were fading much faster.”

However, before the season would end, Gehrig would have several 4 hit games. He would also hit his 23^rd career grand slam, a record at the time and pile his numbers up. There was even a point where he had improved so much since his dismal beginning of the season where he was hitting .300, which is baseball’s mark of excellence. However, the spike in drive faded, and Gehrig pulled himself out of the lineup before batting, keeping his streak alive only because of a half inning of defensive work.

While the season’s end saw the Yankees beat the Cubs in the World Series, capping off a comeback season for the record books, Gehrig went 4 for 14 in the contest, playing averagely at best. While his teammate’s celebrated, Gehrig got drunk on triples of hard liquor, suffering over the new normal in his life.

Had ALS never come, Gehrig’s energy would have been channeled into greatness, but instead, he willed himself to be very good. In fact, for many players, he would have had a career year. Nevertheless, for Lou, very good wasn’t good enough. 

He was more than good enough for the Hall of Fame in 1939. What's more, he is a hero and a role model for the courage he faced that year and the hindsight we can all get from his numbers, which reflect the true performance of the all-time best.